Showing posts with label Senior Dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Senior Dating. Show all posts

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Will I Get Her Back by Changing My Behavior, FAQs

My reader asks "Will I get her back by changing my behavior?". Unfortunately, my reader didn't go into a lot of information about what his current behavior is, except to say he hasn't been handling it very well and his friends are just telling him to "Get over it".


But I can pretty much guess his behavior falls into 1 of 3 usual patterns. Before I go into those behaviors, I want you keep something in mind if you are trying to get a girl back. If you learn nothing else here, lock this one thing into your brain:


Your Mindset is Everything!


Let's talk a little about the 3 common behaviors following a break up.


Behavior 1
Thinking guilt or pity will bring her back. This dude has sent her enough flowers to keep the florists kid in college for the next year. He sends her a hundred texts a day, begging her to come back, they all go unanswered. He announces his undying love for her, that is ignored or worse, scorned. This behavior has no chance in hell of succeeding. This guy has no idea of the correct steps to take.


Behavior 2
Then there's the nutcase, who drives by her house a hundred times a day, shows up at her work or school and waits for her come out. He rings her phone endlessly. He's gung-ho, overly aggressive in his approach. Pretty soon his ex explodes all over him, then she completely ignores him...he's one mistake away from a restraining order.


Behavior 3
The total loser. This is the guy that cries all day, staring out the window hoping to see her drive up. He stares at the phone, begging it to ring and it be her. He keeps the stereo turned off because every damn song that plays reminds him of her. Yeah, she's gonna run right back to this broken, needy, shattered mess - uh not likely.


I hope you starting to see why mindset is so important. To get control of the relationship, you first must get control of yourself.


As long as you are asking "Will I get her back?", I can assume your mindset is all wrong. Just the tone of that question reeks of desperation, and that leaves your girl seeing you as weak, needy, and "clingy"...all very bad signals to be giving off.


Now, getting a girl back isn't all that difficult, if you maintain the proper mindset. You must have a positive outlook!


Come on man, you know she loved you once - And, Yes she is still watching. This is the very reason you can't be exhibiting any of the behaviors we talked about above. This is the time you have to put on your game face and exude confidence, even if you don't feel it right now.


The behaviors and actions you show right now will determine if you will get her back or not. Instead of the behaviors we talked about above, a few of the things you need to be working on are:


Confidence
Women admire a confident man. They desire someone who appears self-confident, decisive, and knows what he wants and how to get it. Women want to respect their man above all else.


Optimism
Lose the gloom and doom attitude if you want her back. Optimism is attractive to her, it makes her, and everyone, feel better about themselves. Women want a man that expects good things to be headed his way.


Happiness
Think about how you were before the break up. Were you happy? If not, if you were miserable - then trust me, she was miserable too. Depression, stress, a crappy attitude are all things that drag a relationship down. After all, the reason for being with someone is to be happy.


Working on those traits will get you started for now, use them and develop them! Take a long hard look at yourself, are you exhibiting one of the three behaviors, or are you showing your ex a confident, optimistic guy that is happy and fun to be around?


Stop asking "Will I get her back?" and start saying "I will get her back" by changing my attitude and having the proper mindset!


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Friday, November 25, 2011

My Ex Boyfriend Doesn't Want to Be Friends! How to See The Positive in This

You've read everything you could about how to get an ex boyfriend back, right? You've asked your friends their opinion on what the best approach to take is. Maybe you've tried the infamous "no-contact" rule in an attempt to woo him back. I'll bet you've even attempted to be his friend but nothing has worked. You're feeling overwhelmed with desperation, frustrated to the point of breaking down and overcome with sadness at the prospect of a life without the man you truly adore. Sounds about right, yes? Instead of wallowing in the negative, it's time to embrace it. Take for instance, the issue of an ex boyfriend who doesn't even want to be friends. You need to see that this is a positive step instead of a life changing one. You can actually use his decision to not be friends with you to draw him back to you in a romantic way.

Many women believe that unless they can get their ex boyfriend to be their platonic friend, their future isn't going to include a renewed romance. That's not necessarily the case at all. Although it can help to rebuild a connection if you two are friends, it can also establish a strong new bond that will be hard to break free from. If your ex boyfriend has always been the type of man who preferred male friends to female friends, you should see his reluctance to be your friend as a positive. He doesn't want you to be his friend for the simple reason that he isn't able to separate romantic feelings from friendship ones. You can use this knowledge to your advantage as you work to get him to want you as his girlfriend again.

Don't push to talk with him. If he's made it clear to you that his desire to not be friends also includes no interest in talking right now, respect that. Just because you two are no in contact at the moment, doesn't mean that the future can't be completely different. You should be using this time to focus on the woman you are as well as the potential partner that you can be to him.

Just because he has no desire to be friends, don't allow that to impact your friendships with those closest to him. If you became friendly with one of his guy friends, utilize that connection now. The same can be said if you grew close to his siblings or mother. Invite those people out to lunch and spend time with them. Make certain that they see you as a vibrant, fun and happy person. Obviously word will get back to your ex boyfriend and you want him to know that with or without him you're still the same woman he always knew.

By respecting his choice you are sending him a silent message that you respect him as a partner and a man. He'll come to see that as a very positive thing. He'll also continue to hear complimentary things about you from mutual friends and acquaintances that you both spend time with. This will show him that you're incredibly strong and emotionally mature.

Remember that the best advice you can follow after a break up is to nurture and protect your own heart first. Your ex boyfriend's decision not to be your friend doesn't necessarily have to dictate what your future together will be. For now, give him the space he needs, focus on your needs and enjoy mutual friends.


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Wednesday, November 16, 2011

5 Signs Its Time to End Your Relationship

In our heart of hearts, we always know when a relationship is ending. Sadly, people avoid and ignore the signs - staying in relationships long past their expiry date. Why? Breaking up is painful and people would rather delay dealing with it and avoid feeling the pain for as long as possible.

If you are unhappy and in a relationship you sense isn't serving you any longer, then read on. Also, please know this is a very brief synopsis of each sign. I could easily have written pages about each one but only have limited space here. If, after reading this article, you feel you need more in depth guidance and support, be sure to take me up on my offer at the end, ok?

1) Fighting
Has your relationship become a battleground? If so, then the only thing you have left in common is conflict. When you're at this point, the relationship is no longer nourishing you, instead it's depleting you. Fighting can be healthy within a flourishing relationship, but continual repetitive purposeless arguments with nothing being resolved indicates the relationship is over.

2) Small Common Ground
When all the things that connected you in the beginning are now replaced with a multitude of differences. You may find all the activities, habits and even where you want to vacation no longer align.
The most common place this shows up is in time. One partner feels daily intimate connection is vital, while the other prefers just weekends.

3) Boredom
Another way to tell it's over is when your waking up depressed, vaguely disconnected and blue. You're not sure what's the matter with you, nothing terrible has happened, you just have an overall feeling of hopelessness and very little joy in your life. This often means the essential vitality in your relationship is gone and you're not "in love" any more.

I want to point out there is a big difference between comfortable familiarity and boredom. The best metaphor is the difference between a comfortable pair of shoes and old shoes that have worn out and hurt your feet. Check in and see which shoe fits YOU.

4) Emotional Distance
This is when you become aware that the person you've been relating with is no longer there when you reach out to make contact. Any attempt to have a conversation consistently illicits a negative response. This is what people mean when they refer to "a lack of communication". When communication has broken down (verbal, sexual, emotional, affection) this is experienced as emotional distance.

5) Moving Away
Many relationships that have gone past their expiry date really collapse when there's a change in geography. Habits and routines are often the glue that binds and supports a relationship. For this reason, a relationship that is ending will be severely impacted with a change in location. The relationship was being held together by the house, the neighbourhood or town.

Couples will buy and build their dream house and, once moved in, the relationship falls apart. It may look like moving was the problem, but actually the breakdown was already occurring long before.

If one or more of these points is resonating, then we should probably talk. I've successfully helped many women smoothly transition either back to the honeymoon stage as well as expertly guide others to release a relationship in the most loving, least painful and conscious way. 


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Friday, November 11, 2011

Get The Psychological Advantage And Bring Your Ex Boyfriend Back Fast!

When your ex boyfriend broke up with you, he had the psychological advantage. You were no doubt taken by surprise and before you knew what was happening, you were crying and begging him to change his mind. Once he is gone, you will feel sad and lonely. If you are like most women you will also feel that you were responsible for the breakup. But, if you want to bring your ex boyfriend back fast, you have to gain the psychological advantage.

Being desperate and constantly trying to contact him will only allow him to keep the psychological advantage and as long as he has this advantage you will never get him back. He knows you are still in love with him and he can get you back anytime he wishes. Knowing that he can go out and have a good time and even date other women. You will become a backup in case he fails to find someone else.

The way to gain the psychological advantage and bring your ex boyfriend running back is to take away his safety net and leave him out in the cold. You have to make him see the breakup was a mistake and understand he is still in love with you and will do anything to have you back in his arms. When your ex boyfriend begins to miss hearing your voice and seeing your smile, you will gain the psychological advantage.

How can you do this? Getting a man and keeping him is all a matter of using male psychology. You have to constantly be pushing his emotional hot buttons and make him feel you are always just a little out of his reach. The best way to accomplish this is to make him feel he cares more for you than you care for him. That may seem a heartless thing to do, but it is the way to keep a man.

Men are natural hunters and if he is not constantly hunting you, he will go hunt for someone else. That is just a fact of relationships. Look at all of the women who are married to handsome men. Most of these women are not beautiful, but they know how to keep a man's interest sparked. They always make him feel like he hasn't quite won them completely. As long as a man feels he must work for your love, he will stay with you.

This is what you did when you first sparked your ex boyfriend's interest. You toyed with him and made yourself hard to get. As long as you kept him guessing and stayed a little out of his reach, he kept chasing you. Your mistake was allowing him to think he had you and you couldn't let him go. To regain the psychological advantage you have to change his attitude.

As hard and scary as it may be you will have to let your guy go for a while. You must ignore him and go out and live your life. Be seen having fun and even flirt with other guys. If your ex boyfriend still loves you, he will awaken to the fact that he could be losing you for good. That should push his hot buttons and make him see his mistake in taking you for granted. This should also bring him back fast, however you can never let him think he owns you if you want to keep your man.


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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Super Effective Tricks to Get My Ex to Talk to Me Again! This is an Absolute Must Know For You

Do you feel frustrated because of your broken romance relationship? Do you want to explain about your situation to your ex that led to break up? You can then make use of some tricks to get your ex to talk to you again.

You should remember that calling your ex over and again cannot help to get him/her back. Instead, it would irritate him/her. You need to give your ex enough time to think about the break up clearly.

You can also dedicate your time to think about where it went wrong in your relationship. It is worth to focus on your negative aspect. You can then start your communication with an apology for your wrong behavior that hurt your ex in the past. If your ex does not want to respond, then you can send short messages to his/her mobile phone. It is not advisable to show that you have broken down. You can send SMS in a friendly manner at least three times a week.

You need to dress well to attract the attention of your ex. You can start doing some workouts and drop your extra pound. This can make your ex to realize that he/she is missing something in his/her life.

You can ask any of your common friends to explain your situation to your ex. However, you need to be careful in choosing a friend who can communicate your mind clearly to your ex. Some of your friends may advise you to go out and meet a new partner to kindle the envy of your ex. Some may advice to consume alcohol and have some fun. You cannot get your ex back in either ways.

If your ex starts thinking that he/she misses you more, you need to use that chance to rebuild your relationship stronger than before.

Pay Close Attention Here-

Now listen carefully! Take 2 minutes to read the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will have your ex begging you to take them back. There is a set of easy to follow psychological tricks which will make your ex crawl back to you within a few days guaranteed. I strongly urge you to read everything on the next page before it's too late and time runs out

Bulk SMS (a.k.a. Text Messages) are quickly becoming the hottest way to market products and services.  By putting your advertisement directly in the hands of your customer you drastically increase response rates and boost sales overnight.


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Friday, October 28, 2011

How to Live With an Ex-Boyfriend When You Still Love Him

Not all relationships can come to an abrupt end just because they have ended. In today's world, where it can be incredibly hard to maintain a residence on your own, more and more couples rush into living together. When they break up, they get stuck living together for a while, because they cannot afford to just pick up and leave. Then, there is the added burden of having a lease that you may not be able to break. So, it is actually somewhat common for a couple to break up, yet still live together for a little while.

That in and of itself can be complicated enough. What if, you still love your ex boyfriend and you are still living together? That can be downright unbearable. While it certainly is not the most "ideal" situation, there are some things that you can do to make it less dramatic than it needs to be.

Here are a few tips if you are still living with an ex boyfriend and you still love him:

1) You have to maintain some boundaries.

It's one thing to still live in the same house or apartment. It's another thing to share the same bed together. If you are still in love with your ex boyfriend and you are living in the same quarters, then it is extremely important that you set some kind of boundaries. If you continue to sleep with him, not only are you going to stay attached, but you are also giving him kind of a "dream" like situation. He's got you at home, but he is not committed to you.

While it may be easy to get caught up in a weak moment, or a moment of passion, think about the consequences. If you let him know that even though you and him are a couple no more, that he can still reap the benefits, don't expect him to take your feelings too seriously.

2) You need to decide once and for all if you want to repair the relationship or find your way out.

At some point, if the two of you are broken up, one of you has to leave. You can't live together after breaking up forever. So, you really need to come to a point where you are either going to try your best to work things out with him or make a plan to get yourself out of this situation. If you continue to stay with him even though you are not "with" him, not only are you going to get messed up emotionally... you will also probably never fully move on.

If your decision is to leave altogether, then work hard on making arrangements. See if there is any family that you can stay with for a short time while you get back on your feet. Find a friend who may let you room with them for a while. If your decision is to work things out, then you need find a proven method to make him want the same thing. Whatever your decision is, you cannot look at the situation of living with your ex boyfriend as being permanent. Either you work things out or you leave.


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